Off topic-Need some advice
This is completely off topic, but I don't know who to talk to about this so I am turning to all my blog friends. Last October, S and I attended a wedding. It was a very lovely wedding and we had a great time. The bride and groom are both very successful and already have most of the stuff they need for their home-so in lieu of gifts they suggested charitable donations to their favorite organizations. We are the type of couple who always go to their registry to purchase gifts-this way we know that they are getting something that they really want. Therefore, when we got this note, S and I decided to donate to the 3 organizations they selected. For 2 of the 3 groups, we were asked if we were giving this as a gift so we were able to provide their names. For one of the organization, we were not asked(I did it on line so there was no spot to even mention that this was for a wedding registry). We got confirmation that all 3 organizations received our donation. Here is where I need help-we never received a thank you note from the couple. Now this is the first time I ever made a donation as a gift-do any of you know if they just forgo all thank you notes? I guess I just want to make sure that bride and groom is aware that we made those donations on their behalf-and I don't want them to think that we totally blew off their wedding present. Should we say something? And what should we say? How do we even bring up this topic? Or should I just let it go and assume that they know? I guess I just don't want to be labeled as that couple who went to our wedding and never gave us a gift.
PS. I know that they technically have a year to send out thank you notes...but they just had twins and I sent the twins baby gifts and we already received a thank you note for that--so this shows that they don't' blow off thank you notes--at least that's how I interpret it.
PS. I know that they technically have a year to send out thank you notes...but they just had twins and I sent the twins baby gifts and we already received a thank you note for that--so this shows that they don't' blow off thank you notes--at least that's how I interpret it.
posted by MoMo at 8:30 PM
7 Comments:
How close are you to the couple? Can you just ask them? Maybe say something like "Hey, I got a note from the charities recently that we donated to for your wedding. Did you got a lot of wonderful donations?" ... or something along those lines.
I know what you mean though. I wouldn't want someone to think i didn't give them a gift.
I think it's okay to be straighter with them--you can fib a little if it makes you more comfortable, like say, "Hey, I never got a confirmation that these charities got our donation, did they send you a note to let you know we donated in your name?" Just like if you had had a gift sent from the registry it would be OK to ask if they got it and blame it on not being sure if the store messed up the order.
PS The "pretending to be worried the gift never arrived" move is sanctioned by Miss Manners, FYI! ;)
I am very much an honesty-is-the-best-policy. So if you think she is open person, I'd just ask her. Or, I would just not worry about it and assume they just never found out who gave what. Or you could call the places and ask if they notified the couple of your donation and how it was handled. :-) That is weird. I am surprised they didn't do it through a web site that manages it better like http://www.justgive.org/html/news/wedding_release_03.html
thanks for all your support!
I agree with electriclady.
I would check to see if they got the donations...
p.s. congrats on 28 weeks!
Hi Momo!
I had to go back & catch up about your work issues, I am so sorry, what a pain! I'm glad it seems settled now.
Re this post: I would act as if you're concerned the notice about the wedding gift never reached the couple and just act casual, as if you're following up to make sure it did.
And congrats again on the pregnancy, I am so happy for you!!
XOXO
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