Lilypie Expecting a baby Ticker

Monday, January 14, 2008

Things I've learned

Yes, surprisingly I actually learned something from this process-okay I learned a lot. One of the major things I realized is that you can only do your best and you have no control over what the outcome of this entire process will be. You follow your doctor's orders, take the medication and give yourself the injections, at the end of the day you are still powerless. I know this sound very depressing, but it is a reality that I've come to accept.

I went for my blood work and u/s today. I have to admit that having a doctor do my follicle count was nice-he seems like he was more thorough than the technicians I am accustomed to. It was very nice to get all that extra attention. Here is where my lesson comes in. Dr. W(the doctor here) informed me that I have about 15 follicles on left ovaries and 6-7 on the right. Sounds promising right? But the last time I did this, I had a follicle count of 22 and ended up with 7 fertilized. I remember being very upset at that time-thinking that my body failed me. But the reality is that numbers are good, but it doesn't mean that they are all viable. I am okay with that-I am just wishing for a good number-7 would be good again-enough to transfer and possibly freeze. But again, that is looking way too far ahead.

Per favorite nurse, I am decreasing gonal F to 75 units and I am down to 1 menopur powder starting tonight. I have to go back for blood work and u/s tomorrow. (a little voice in my head is afraid that I am over stimulated--yes I said I learned something doesn't seem I am no longer afraid...)

I haven't talked about the logistics of this cycle. I went through so many different scenarios in my head to figure out how to make this work. First we were going to take B with us and have a family friend watch him while S and I go for the transfer. After the transfer S and B will fly back home-since S needs to go back to work and we have our nanny to watch B at home. I will stay in until after the transfer. Second option is for us to take our nanny this way we don't have to worry about B and she can help S fly back with B. Another option would have been for B to stay with me in this is too complicated since I need someone to watch him during the transfer and I was planning on working between the retrieval and transfer.

Luckily, as of last week, my parents decided to stay with us until the 25ht(they are with us visiting). With this new development, we decided to leave B behind and S will fly back right after the retrieval. We are hoping to do our retrieval the first few days of the series this way he can get back before they leave. If our retrieval is late...we are back to the options above--crossing my fingers that this will not be the case.

So easy right, big problem solve-well, I am very very depress that I won't see B for about 8-10 days!!!! I started crying the other night just thinking about this. I know he is in good hands and he will be okay, but I've never been away from him overnight! And 10 days is a long time. I know I could have picked a clinic out here and we won't have to deal with this, but right now this is the best option for our family. And I also know it is a small sacrifice for us as we try and expand our family, but none of these reasons is making this situation any easier. Any suggestions on how to make this easier for me? I know B will just be fine-he might look for mommy-especially at night-but I think this will be harder for me than B.


Blogger The Dunn Family said...

I wish I had advice. I don't. Just hugs. It's definitely going to be harder for you than B when you are gone. Kids are resilient and easy. When we went away for a long weekend, my parents and sis watched the twins, and they were as happy as could be the whole time we were gone. And it's all for a good cause! Wishing you so much luck on this cycle!

January 14, 2008 7:35 PM  
Blogger Thalia said...

I'd find a way to take him with you, for at least part of it. 8-10 days is a lifetime to a baby that age, he will really miss you, even if he doesn't show it much, and he doesn't have the language to explain how he's feeling.

January 14, 2008 11:14 PM  
Blogger Angie said...

Just dropping by with some positive wishes for you.

January 15, 2008 8:01 AM  
OpenID maryellenandsteve said...

I think that all sounds very promising this time around. I am excited for you!

January 15, 2008 9:42 AM  
OpenID unexplainthis said...

I don't have any real advice. Other than you could call him each night. It sounds silly but Kirsten def. knows are voices on the phone. It might help you and him some.

You'll miss him tons. Maybe you could just bring him and the nanny with you anyway? Assuming you can swing it financially of course.

January 15, 2008 12:50 PM  

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